Feelings of defeat

These are some hard times for many Americans. It`s easy to wake up each morning and feel discouraged and afraid. I know because I too fight these feelings, all the time. I have always been a “grab your bootstraps” kind of guy, but the straps are broken. That is true unless I view everything through Christ. Oh how quaint that statement sounds…it sounds cliché, but it`s really the only true answer to life in this world.

I was a self-made man for most of my life. I owned several successful businesses and made a lot of money. I remember a time when anything I wanted, materially, I could have. The problem in my life was that I didn`t have Jesus. No matter how much money I made. No matter how many girlfriends I had. No matter how many or what kind of motorcycles I had—I was never happy. I had money, I had power, I had women, I had homes, I had cars and trucks—I had it all—and it never filled the hole inside.

I was a tuff guy. I was a second degree black belt and a certified Karate instructor. Because I grew up without a father, I loved to fight to prove my manhood. I loved to “punk out” other men. I got off on making other men tremble in my presence. As a boss in a motorcycle club, I had the power to do just that—but it was all useless garbage compared to Christ.

I say all these things to bring everything to one main point. No matter what you`re going through the positive aspect is Christ. See, I lost all of the things I listed above—all of them. At the time I lost all my money, I was mad as hell. I remember a guy threatening to report me to the authorities because I said I was headed to D.C. with a 50 cal. to set things right. I had gone back to college and was working on an English degree and I wrote political columns for the Examiner; however, all it ever brought me was anger. Recently my pastor said, “Maybe God placed President Obama in office!” Nothing I did or pursued in life satisfied my hunger—a hunger I could not explain or even understand. It was a hunger for God.

The truth for me (and maybe for some of you as well) is that in losing everything I found everything—I found Christ. With my massive ego and all my connections, in my former life, I would have never needed Christ until it was too late.

On a Saturday night in May of 2012 a club brother (one that won`t even speak to me today) said, “Brother, let`s go up to that church and pray tomorrow.” That man will never truly know what he did for me in making that suggestion. I owe him a great debt of gratitude that he will never know. I would have never gone to church. I would have never humbled myself. He claimed to be a Christian and so he thought we should pray for the answers to a problem we were having within the club at that time. Oh how the Lord works in ways we cannot see or comprehend.

That next morning I was saved. For the first time I truly met Jesus. I had a supernatural experience and my life was changed. By the next weekend I was out of my club. None of the former brothers I had would even look at me. So now, I had not only lost everything materially in my life,—but suddenly—I had lost all my friends, brothers, mentors, and my belief system. I feel chill bumps as I write this. The week this all went down I felt like I was in a total identity crisis. I felt so alone and lost. This was in spite of my experience at the foot of the cross one week earlier. This—my brothers and sisters—is the beauty of our Father in Heaven; this is where we get to truly see his version of mercy and grace. What many that I used to ride with would see as a total loss was in fact my rebirth into a new and wonderful life with Jesus. I hold no judgment or resentment toward them. That`s not my point. My point is that as a boss in the club, when I threw someone out, I always felt like, “Man, I would hate to be them.” In my case, I`m sure my old brothers and sisters thought the same, and still do; however, it was the best thing that could have happened to me, and only God knew that.

God the father knew that the only way he could ever reach me was if I lost everything—everything! He is the only true and wise King. His wisdom cannot be seen by the world, or by fools. This reminds me of when Jesus asked the disciples who they thought that he was. Peter answered, “The Christ…the Son of God.” Jesus replied, “This has not been revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in Heaven.” Meaning, spiritual truths cannot be explained with words—they must be experienced firsthand.

I think of the example of Paul. He was a man who was respected, had money, was educated, had standing in the world, and was pure according to the Laws of God; however, he stated later that he counted `ALL’ things a loss compared to Christ. I know exactly what he meant. We are never defeated my brothers and sisters. Even in death itself, in this world, we win.

I have one final point I would like to make that also puts everything in proper perspective. Compared to so many others who have followed Jesus, we here in America have it made. We have never known the kind of suffering our brothers and sisters in other nations, past and present, have suffered. I thank God for his mercy and grace. WP

The church: The Modern Day Christian

I had a dear friend of mine (a brother in my motorcycle ministry) bring up a topic at our monthly ministry meeting that had explosive potential. We do a devotional at the start of our monthly chapter meetings and his topic was, of all things, Facebook. I could see the tension build in the room as he read from his notes. And what was his point? His point was the same as those Christians who came before us—how do you, as a Christian, conduct yourself in public. In the old days it was not as easy for us to make an ass of ourselves to 1000 people in 5 seconds flat.

I have to admit, I have made an ass of myself on Facebook many times. Most of those were prior to becoming a Christian; however, not all of them were. I have “liked” things that were off-color. I have posted inflammatory statements. I have engaged in fruitless political dogma and arguments, and I have cussed a few people out as well. Thank God for the “delete” button on FB (laughing).

My brother brought up some great points in his remarks. I think his words hit a few targets in the room, although knowing him as I do, I doubt that was his real intent. I think his intent was simple—for us all to take a look, as Christians, in the mirror. I can think of a half dozen scriptures that tell us to except criticism from our fellow Christians, but so many of us allow ego to steal our ability to learn.

This leads me to my main point, which might surprise the readers. I think we Christians can look at the Trayvon Martin trial and find a stark parallel. First a scripture:

“If My people (Christians) who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land” (2 Chronicles 7:14, NKJV).

This scripture has been in my mind for over a week. This is the second blog post in which I have referenced this scripture in within the week.

As I look out and see the violence, the calls for justice, and the threats…I also see that some who are involved are Christians. I heard two separate statements by black Pastors that were nothing short of inflammatory. I thought about all the other murders in this nation—black on black, white on black, black on white, or whatever—that no one seems to care about. I thought about the millions of babies we abort—especially in the black communities—and again, no one cares.

Moreover, I wondered about forgiveness within these communities and by these Christians? How long will these black Pastors and Christian leaders allow their church members to remain in state of resentment over slavery and past deeds by lawless Judges, Supreme Court rulings, and racists from the days of old? Jesus said several things about forgiveness. I`m paraphrasing, but here are a few: check your own back yard before you check your neighbors. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Turn the other cheek. Forgive seventy times seven—and there are so many more.

I`m calling on all Christians—black, white, yellow, brown, or whatever—to come together and refrain from the vitriolic rhetoric of the politicians, the so-called race leaders, and the agents of the enemy himself who seek to divide us and destroy our witness to a lost and dying world. We cannot help those who do not know Jesus if we ourselves look and act like the world.

In 60 A.D., there was one Christian church. Now…sect, denominations, skin color, and politics divide us. My dear brothers and sisters, Jesus will not pay attention to these things on his judgment day. Only the world cares about these things. To my fellow black and white Christian brothers and sisters—it is up to us to lead the way. May God bless you all. WP

Forgiveness

I grew up in AA. Alcoholics Anonymous was the bedrock that finally led me to Christ. In all AA meetings (at least those I have attended over a 24 year period) they say the Lord`s prayer at the end of the meeting. One verse in particular changed my life over the last year:

“…And forgive our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us…”

I had said these words in 1000 meetings or more over a span of two decades, and yet, I did not live by them. I still attend some meetings now and then. I love some of the friends I have made over the years. If it weren’t for AA I would never have found Christ. When I went through the experience, over a year ago now, of leaving the club I rode with, I had given my life to Christ, but I was still filled with anger and hate. I had years of trash built up inside me, and I had been branded in a way that I knew was false. I wanted so badly to set the record straight, but then, I realized that Jesus gave me the best example of them all.

Jesus went before Pilate and never spoke a word in his own defense. He was accused of many things that were blatant lies. He was beaten and spit on for things he never did. And yet, he never offered a word in defense of his innocence. I`m no saint, but I learned from that example that Jesus is my only defense—he is all sufficient.

I was moved to make amends to some of the people from my past. In the case of my old brotherhood, it was like walking into a den of thieves and asking to be forgiven for stealing, but I had to clean my side of the street. My amends was rejected by most, but that`s okay because it` none of my business. I did the right thing, that`s all that counts.

That was a very personal and difficult action to take. But on a larger scale, how can we ask to be forgiven if we are not able to forgive? This question haunted me. The Lord`s prayer haunted me. I began to see my fellow human beings in a whole new light. The old hate, resentments, and biases began to melt away. I was able to see that people are not the ones who hurt us, it`s the spirit that drives them that does.

I can` be angry or judge those who do to me the same things I have done to others in my past. These are all God`s children—he loves them so very much—and I respect and love my Father in Heaven, so I will respect and love his children. I will forgive their trespasses, their faults, and their actions in the same way I would like to be forgiven myself. 

Forgiveness sets us free. I am so blessed today because I am surrounded by a church body that loves my wife and I no matter what. I wear a patch today that plainly shows I serve Christ. The Bible tells us that if we walk with fools we will become fools. If we walk with men of anger and violence, we will become men of anger and violence. I spent years proving to the world how tough I was—today I want to love people, and smile, and share the joy of my Lord with the world. WP

`Live by the sword...die by the sword'

I was heading out one Sunday with some club brothers (in my former life), and back then, I would occasionally visit this one particular church. I called myself a Christian in spite of the fact that I had been in fights, shootouts, stole bikes, cheated on all my wives, and exacted physical punishment within the ranks of my old club with a smile on my face.

When we arrived at the church that day, I saw a guy that thought he was a real bad-ass. He was no wimp, but he loved to trash women. He had never ridden with a club but he professed to be a gang member once and he had spent some time in the joint. I always had a pet-peeve for guys who hit women—I watched my mother beaten as a kid and I hated men who mistreated women in any form or fashion (verbally or physically). I loved to make these guys soil their britches. Notice my mentality back then—I mistreated women all the time as a cheater and a womanizer, but nevertheless…

This guy was about 6`3” or 4” (not sure) and he towered over me at 5`11”. These were my favorite moments—I loved to challenge men to their faces, no matter the consequences. I headed for him and walked up on a conversation in which he was, as usual, bragging about how much of a bad-ass he was.

I walked up to him…looked him in the eye and said, “Live by the sword and you will die by the sword.” Note to self: Never speak a prophetic word on sacred church grounds—it will come true! I never saw him again, in fact, I can`t remember his name; however, I “died by the sword” myself about a year or so after telling this man that he would.

Long story short, I was banished from my club for fighting with a superior officer. I was guilty of some things, that was true, but the things that were said about me, the history revisionism, and the hatred and resentment that I experienced (and still do to this very day) were—I believe—God`s answer to a prayer. These things were also my own prophetic words, spoken to another man on church property, coming back to haunt me.

When I came to the Lord on May 20^th of 2012, I asked Him to remove anything that stood in the way of my devotion to Him. God answered that prayer. He never does so in the way we would think is best, but he always does what is best for our lives and his plan.

I have learned one very important thing in this life that I did not know or practice in my old life: Those who give no mercy will receive no mercy. Those who give no forgiveness will receive none. Yeah, I was a real bad-ass. I hold a second degree black belt, I have faced some of the meanest bikers in America, and I`ve gone to war for my club—but—God`s wrath is terrible and mighty. We humans have no idea how horrible it is to face the God of Heaven when he is angry.

Yes, we may escape his wrath for a time because he loves us so much. He loves us so much more than we can even understand; however, one day—when the time of the Gentiles is fulfilled—the Eastern sky will break open and all who thought they were bad-asses will prostrate themselves in wretched fear of Almighty God and the Lion of Judah. Oh, I thank my Heavenly Father for his grace and mercy. I thank him for the pain and humbling I received that brought me to his feet at the cross. I pray for those who do not fear God, who do not give mercy, and who do not allow forgiveness to those who seek forgiveness. God is a loving and patient Father but someday he must reward those who have run the race. Someday he will decide to make his Saints wait no longer. If you do not know Christ on that day…it will be a day of complete and unrelenting terror (Joel 2:28-32). You who think you have no fear will see the true meaning of fear. I say this not as a threat, but as a sincere and prayerful warning that you who do not know Christ will come to the cross and receive the free gift of his love and grace. God have mercy on this lost and dying world.

I heard Dr. Stanley of First Baptist Church of Atlanta say, “The best story to reveal the true character and personality of God is the story of the Prodigal Son” (Luke 15:11-32). You see, I`m not a man who likes to preach “fire and brimstone” because I know that God`s will is that you would come home to him just like the Prodigal Son.. He calls us “The apple of his eye.” He sent his Son Jesus to die on the cross as payment for sin—a payment that must be made to rectify the world to a Holy and Just God.  

But…what do I know…I`m just an old grey beard biker who fell at the feet of Jesus. Amen

A poem about addiction and God`s grace

The Thorn in my Side

The mental obsession,

It won`t go away,

It won`t l let me go,

It leads me astray.

Help me o` lord, I need to be strong;

The days are so short, my nights are long.

Do for me lord what I can`t do for myself;

Put me away on some high moral shelf.

I fall on my face; I curl up and pray,

Please take it lord, please keep it at bay.

The mind is locked in, nothing else can I think;

The evil inside gives a laugh and a wink.

I have no control, there is nowhere to run.

The thorn in my side gives off heat like the sun.

I look for some answer, a proverb, a verse;

As the darkness surrounds me a prayer I rehearse.

Then finally it’s plain that release must be had;

My soul deep in sadness my addiction so bad;

My fist pounds the table, why can`t I let go?

The thorn in my side makes a prisoner my soul.

The morning sun breaks to yet one more day.

My heart drops like a rock, my senses astray.

The black hole is deep and it`s end can`t be found;

The thorn in my side, in my misery I drowned.

The darkness returns and the demonic beast;

My flesh is destroyed—my soul is its feast.

The heart is no matter my prayers go unheard;

The lord has abandoned—I scoffed at his word.

I awoke in the night to bright light rushing in;

The demons all scurried and they ran from within;

Lighting and thunder, trumpets and wind;

Angelic beings came and took all my sin.

The Lord God Almighty sits high on his throne;

He never forsakes us we are never alone.

No matter how deep or how far or how wide;

The Lord and his mercy took the thorn from my side.

© William Power (2011) 

The unanswered questions we pose to our God

This post is an excursion into a topic that is more about Jesus and our faith than motorcycles. I hope you enjoy it. WP

I am a huge fan, and follower, of Ravi Zacharias the world renowned Christian Apologist. If you have not heard of Ravi, I suggest you take a moment to find a few of his videos on YouTube—he is a brilliant man who loves Jesus and obviously has Gods favor on his work. Dr. Zacharias has argued apologetics with some of the most famous atheists and agnostics in the world to include Stephen Hawking.

In a recent Q&A event at Princeton University Dr. Zacharias was joined by Vince Vitale (I`m not very familiar with Vince; however, he made for an interesting partner with Ravi) to advance apologetic arguments. It was a brilliant and exciting discussion of the empirical and existential reasons why our faith, our Jesus, our beliefs are the only true beliefs in this world.

In one of the questions from the audience (which was based on `If there is a God, why is there evil in this world’) Vince Vitale made a very simple yet superb argument for the questions in this life that are, or may remain, unknown to us as humans—and why.

He used a very simple metaphor: He basically stated that his dog trusted him and followed his every command. He went on to say that when he takes his dog to the vet and the vet determines that the dog needs a shot; he does not try to explain the shot to the dog.  He stated that the dog was not the same kind of being as he is and therefore cannot—no matter how hard he tries to explain it to the dog—understand why he has to get a long needle and a prick to feel better. The dog simply endures the pain and trusts his master. The dog will never understand at the same level of his master why the shot is good for him—he only feels the pain and is forced, or decides rather, to trust. I found this simple explanation to be vivid and luminous—yet powerful.

There have been many times in my own life I have questioned things that seem impossible to understand, that seem to make no sense what-so-ever, that seem needless or mindless; moreover, these questions at times strained my faith and belief in the existence of a God.

I can only say that pure experience evidenced by  supernatural or unexplainable events in my life were partially responsible for my personal faith; however, for those that may not have had these types of experiences—I hope the above metaphor can bring some light to the questions of “the unexplained.”

I will post the YouTube video below for your personal further review of this topic in more detail. God bless. WP 

The Lord restores us from our sin

I want to share with you a personal experience of God`s word and its truth. I will speak from Joel 2:25:

 “Then I will make up to you for the yearsThat the swarming locust has eaten,The creeping locust, the stripping locust and the gnawing locust,My great army which I sent among you” (NASB)

I spent many years on the road with my old club. I had a beautiful family and a great wife. I was blessed with a nice home and a large income. I had it all. In spite of this I was a man seeking something that would fill a huge hole in my soul. Now, I didn`t have the wisdom to comprehend this at the time—I am speaking from hindsight.

Because of this wonder lust that moved me, pushed me, and caused me to constantly seek things to fill the hole, I ended up finding a strength that would lead to my greatest downfall—EGO.

I was a natural born leader. I`m a second degree black belt, I was head instructor of a large Karate school, I have owned several successful businesses, and yet I was not happy. I would run home from work, jump on the bike, and head out to the club house or off with the boys. I spent two sometimes three weekends a month for 14 years traveling around the country. I eventually became a regional officer of my club, and was afforded many benefits because of that power. Also, I had girlfriends all over the place. I was living the life of a hellion and I loved it. My ego grew bigger and bigger. I enjoyed the fear that I put into the hearts of other men. I reveled in the circles of power I was a part of within the club, and I loved the acts of violence and intimidation that I was involved in, or ordered to perform. This would all lead to a huge and jaw dropping surprise from God when I finally called on his name.

I won`t go into the details in this post, but let`s just say I lost everything: my home, my wife, my business, my world—and the respect of my children.

In May of 2012—last year almost to the day (the 20th), I found myself at the Alter in a little church…on my knees…sobbing…seeking Jesus for real—for once. I found him. One week later God surgically removed me from my old life in a way I could have never guessed, he actually answered my prayer that I had forgotten I had said that day one week earlier. You see, at the Alter that day, I asked God to remove from my life anything that stood in the way of my usefulness to him…and boy he did.

One year later…almost to the day…I reflect back on those weeks and months after I was saved—and they were hard—but they were BLESSED! God took what I would have perceived, through my worldly eyes, as a great tragedy and made it a tremendous victory in my life. I ride with a Motorcycle Ministry today. My kids love, respect, and trust me, and even my ex-wife and I get along very well. God truly did what he promised in Joel 2:25—he restored what the locusts had eaten, and the lost years. Praise the mighty name of Jesus!!

Photo Credit: dhi.ucdavis.edu